History Repeats

Note: This is a rather long response to the previous comment. It was too long to fit into a comment.

I have, in the course of my life, attempted suicide several times. Most of my attempts were before the age of 10, with two after then; twice when I was 12-13. The last time I considered suicide to date was November the twenty first, 2007.

As a child, I was driven to the brink,(and over it) with nonfatal, and less than painful results, such as rope burn, bruises, and in one instance, an upset stomach. I was driven by my peers, other children. I was a target, I was different, I was weak, and I was an easy mark. I had no friends. It was the most painful part of my life.

I grew up mostly lonely. I learned to fend for myself. I learned that I had AS, and I worked towards my goals of achieving a niche in my world. I succeeded, and continue to succeed. I brought success to myself through my sheer tenacity and determination.

In the early morning of November the 21st, I rose from my chair, intending to... I can't say what. I had been sitting for so long, that when I stood, I had a cramp. That jolt of pain shocked me out of my complete and utter disinterest in continued life, and I started to cry for what I had almost done. For what those sons of bitches wanted me to do.

He led a group of adults, mature, reasoning, responsible people, to the blog of a teenager, and encouraged them to harass and abuse me to achieve certain goals. Their most desired objective was for me to stay silent on Phil's abuses of myself and other autistics and aspies. Their next objective was to see if I was an aspie by driving me into a meltdown. Their third objective, contrived by a sick freak that was leading this group, Borusa, was to get me to kill myself.

They achieved their first two goals, as I hit emotional rock bottom and could no longer cope with the simple task of hitting keys on the keyboard correctly, and I eventually left my blogs and ran, hid.

He has never apologized for this. He has never taken any action, nor made any effort to make restitution for this act. He brags of it, he claims that it was justified, he swears that eight grown, mature people harassing a teenager with aspergers is justifiable.

It is sickening.



You paid your debt to him by living. If he wanted anything else in return other than for you to keep living, then you owe him nothing. If you give yourself to this debt, do so by truly seeking change in the system that keeps him unemployed; The CMO decision to bar him from working.

Your system of honesty can never be embraced by Phil; He is not selfless, and he is greatly selfish. Should ever you take a stance that does fully ingrate yourself to his beliefs, he will write up his own little article on you, and throw you away like so much trash. He's done it before, and will do so again.

Flardox. Myself. Members of autistic community forums. All of us have been attacked by Phil. He even had the Aspies For Freedom site taken down, scaring and stranding people who relied on the site for support and socialization, simply because he wanted a few comments deleted now that he was banned. He forced a community to simply cease to be for a couple of days while he had the site owners remove the content he wanted gone.

He wrote an entire article mocking me, simply because he wanted so badly to say without any resistance, that a woman he had never met and had no legal or medical right to deny her diagnosis, was a liar. He refused to allow me not to say that this woman was either autistic, or not autistic. He refused to take any answers but "Yes, she is not autistic, and I am your friend" or "No she is autistic, and I am your sworn enemy." He would not simply let it lie, and let me take the stance I held through it all. I do not have the training or right to diagnose someone of autism over the internet.

He gave no evidence, just statements of personal belief. He had no evidence. He wanted me to ignore this woman because he didn't like what she had to say. I would not stand for it.

And now, years later, I am still this grand "enemy" he made me into in his "Great Aspie War." I am still listed as many a lie on his site, including the possible victim of a future legal action aimed at coercing my silence and some pocket cash. Years later, I still know that he knows where I live. He has my address. From that, he has my telephone number. From that, he has the names of my family. From that, he can harass them.

I have known Phil from a fateful July day in 2007, when a simple disagreement over my blog policy of allowing everyone a free say turned into a four year argument punctuated by his constant threats against me.
He contacted my ISP, trying to have them disconnect my service. He contacted my provincial government to try to convince them I was a threat to myself and others. He has created several articles about me, created a petition he copied from me, harassed me on forums that I visited, blogs that I visited, attempted to bar me from those same blogs, forums, and communities by attempting to file a restraining order.

I've known Phil longer than you, Cubie. And I know his dark side. It is terrible. It is cruel. And it is who he is behind his smiling facade.